SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE.....

Sometimes life gives you challenges, especially when you are trying to better yourself. I've ended something that wasn't healthy for me. It wasn't the easiest thing to do. I have a tendency of caring too much especially for the wrong people. Normally it's because I see some connection there. When the situation becomes detrimental to your self esteem something has got to give. It's like I was choosing to relive my past for some reason. I question it everyday. Your self worth is not all there so you choose the people that make you feel the way you feel inside. If you think negatively and have a negative perspective about yourself then you will only attract the wrong person.

I believe that we all want to grow and be better people In this world. We all want to find our happiness. The happiness is with in. Its within you, to choose to do with all the negativity that you have. You can continue dwelling on it, or you can get rid of it. Now by getting rid of it takes time, it won't go away right away. It can come back to you in so many ways, in situations In life or people. People can bring back all those negative feelings and emotions when you are trying to change.

You may be blind to think that they are the way they are when you first meet them. But there are the clear signs that you tend to avoid. Reason why you avoid it, because you are so attracted to this person somehow. You see something with in you that reminds you so much of your self. Then the other thing you think you can do when surrounded by a person like this, you think you can fix them. You feel like since you are searching for this happiness then maybe they can join you. Always remember you can't fix anyone except yourself.

Now these are not horrible people. These people are just at a different stage in there life. They are not where you are. I can't hate this person, but right now I have anger more with my self than anything else. I do have resentment towards him. I felt like I gave so much and he just threw it away.

I question myself all the time when it comes to this situation. I think about everything that i did. Do I regret it? No! I choose to be the woman that I am, and stick to being who I am. This will not deter me from being who I want to be. I want to be stronger and confident woman. All I wish for is the same for all the people that I have come In contact in my life, hopefully one day they see the beauty with in themselves.

I don't think he reads this, but if he does. All I want to say is, I am sad that this all had to happened. I'm sad that you couldn't see what I did for you. I'm sad that you don't care. I'm sad that you don't see the beautiful person that you truly are, and I'm sad that you hurt me. What I wish and would want is for one day to run into you again and see the happy person that you truly are, take all the negativity out of your life and move past it.

Thanks for reading

Catalina